I am a very self-conscious driver. I am also incredibly impatient, and let's just say the combination adds up to a type of driving my brothers consistently mock me for. Which doesn't help the self-consciousness. You see a pattern here?
Another confession. I adore Las Vegas, and chose to move here for a reason. But to put it mildly, Las Vegas drivers are to road safety what matches, alcohol, dry brush, and outdoor cooking are to forest fires. And that is coming from a native Utahn. I feel like the drivers in Las Vegas have meshed perfectly the obliviousness of Utah drivers with the aggression of L.A. Don't even get me started on what happens on Vegas freeways when it rains. (You'd think they'd never seen rain before. Oh wait...)
All this is to say, on my half hour commutes to and from work, I am constantly torn between fear for my life and a stubborn, competitive self-consciousness that flares up whenever people go faster than me. The impatient, competitive side of me hates that one driver going slow enough to be annoying but too fast to easily pass. The self-conscious part of me is pretty sure I am that driver.
This internal dichotomy has created a habit of constantly checking my rear-view mirror, especially when I slow down. I'm pretty sure drivers are supposed to focus on the cars ahead of them, but I have become hyper-aware of the cars behind me. I am both terrified that every time I slow down the car behind me is going to ram my bumper, and paranoid of being that driver with a line up of cars behind me. I try and maintain a good distance between me and the car in front of me (I've had too many close calls with sudden slowing...oh Vegas freeways), but apparently this isn't aggressive enough because then cars will cut close in front of me and then I have to tap the breaks and then I have to check to make sure no ones going to ram me from behind and then spend the drive feeling self-conscious about being that annoying slow car you have to cut in front of.
Okay, maybe I'm seeing why my brothers tease me.
There is a bright side. Yes, I am ridiculously self-conscious about what the car behind me is thinking. But sometimes, the car behind me has a mustache.